Put The Paradigm Back In the Box and Walk Away

I have to admit...that I have been feeling frustrated lately.

The last few months people have been testing my will--and then my truck. I like my truck. And in the past few months people seem to think or assume that they can do what they wish...like back up into it and drive off, key it, scratch it egg it, break into it, rip decals off, steal a fog light.

Why? What point is there in that?

On top of all that I have a warrant for a speeding ticket, but this part is my fault.

I am turning 30 on Wednesday...currently seeking a job, after which I will try to get an apartment and then focus on school, personal goals, and re-establish old friendships and build new ones.

*deep breath* I just did not want to begin the new year off this way.

For the moment everything seems to have an answer--money.

Granted some of the stuff I listed is superficial--the damaging of other people's property is just out right wrong.

And yet this weekend was the first time I actually had a social life---I had no clue where I needed to be. So I hooked up with some old friends and a bar-b-que and a few --cokes.

It was really great.

I do hope that I can in the near future or not...at least find a friend. I mean friend as in an intimate one--on the intellectual and emotional level. Yeah--I am talking about girlies.

Okay, okay--woman.

It gets easier and easier to socialize--although last night--small world that it is...ran into several people who knew my first love.

*laughing* I saw a picture and there she was...and they wanted to hook me up with her--SO I had to give them a small history lesson.

More than likely because it is a L A R G E and W I D E family that spans across the valley--I meant to be redundant--and very close knit--she will hear about my uhm--rant?

At least the funny feeling in my heart was a bit faint--so that was good...but she is still beautiful.

This week will be my milestone for personal reasons. I hope to at least find a job first...then the apartment, and fix my truck.

But basically...I want my life to begin now.